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When does a break up turn into a break down?
When does a break up turn into a break down?
Break-ups in general can be nasty things, but a theme seems to happen after them that is often seen, well at least amoungst my friends, and I’m pretty sure yours. And it doesn’t seem to be narrowed down to females either, it happens amoungst men too. So before the break-up the partner that leaves may start talking to someone else, and here is where the online world comes into play so much more than it ever did.
Whether they act on anything depends on the persons morals regarding cheating. They might start talking to someone online who sparks off something in them that they no longer get from their current partner and they miss it, and may realise that they need it more than they need to be with their partner. For others its a security blanket that if they do decide to leave they have someone to go to, although their not happy they dont want to be alone, could also be for the security of knowing that they can get someone. Leaving someone, especially when you know they still love you is HARD! So it can help you take that next step you’ve been avoiding and instead settling for the normal that you know. You may not relish stepping out into the scary dating world you may not have been in for a long time! I’m not saying that this scenario is the best, but if your unhappy and someone making you face that happens only through some romantic talk with someone, then maybe its ok, but acting on it I can’t say is…..if you leave someone you will no doubt break their heart and you should respect them enough to not break their trust too!
Often these flings will not work out because once you out in the dating world, suddenly your a new entity and you can go two ways, panic and dive into a relationship straight away because being alone is too scary and then your back at square one. Or you can go into ‘gonna enjoy myself and have some fun!’ mode. This one is where I think a pattern lies. All of my friends and maybe even myself have gone through this phase. For some they go on mad dating spree’s and have many people on the go, enjoying the flirting and fun that comes with dating. This for the right person can be good, but when does it become more a break down? What happens when they realise that with all this fun doesn’t come the security and safe feeling of a relationship. The knowledge too that the persons you having fun with are also seeing other people, playing the field as it were. We can tell ourselves that its just a laugh and that after being bogged down in a relationship we need to let loose a little and that’s ok, but at what point does all this fun become too de-sensitising? I agree its fun getting to know people, and getting interest from the opposite sex is a great ego boost! But after so long the chats on Skype, POF, MSN, and facebook wont be enough. Then the real scary dating part happens!
via Twitoaster